Repetition (refeature)
by The Readers Muse
Summary: "Come on, what about you, Slick? Future you got yourself a girl? "I've got you."
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer:** I don't own the "Men in Black" series or any of its characters, wishful thinking aside.

**Authors Note #1:** I couldn't let young!kay and jay go, apparently.

**Warnings:** time travel, drama, emotional hurt and comfort, flirting, just guys being dudes, romance, slow burn, clueless boys, romance.

**Repetition (refeature)**

_**Chapter One**_

"Uh... Kay?"

He looked up, toothbrush slowing down until it stopped completely in his mouth. Foam threatening to trickle down his chin as Jay's reflection reared to life in the bathroom mirror.

_Huh_.

"What can I do you for, Chief?" he answered steadily. Steadier than he felt if he was being honest as Jay's mouth dropped open. Unable to stop the smile tugging at the corners of his mouth after he spat into the sink and wiped his lips. Turning around to face him as Jay milled awkwardly in the door jamb. Still dressed in the same suit, if not a bit more rumpled and depressed than the last time he'd seen him.

"Uh. Why am I here?" Jay asked, looking around as he rubbed his head. "Wait, is this your place?"

"Your asking me?" he hummed, leaning back against the sink as he took him in openly. Pleased beyond reason at seeing him again. "You're the one who travels through time, hondo. Remember?"

He had to admit, he didn't think he'd see him again, not until-

"Yeah, but this time I wasn't," Jay shot back, black shoes shuffling across the shag carpet. "There was no jumpin'. Last time I checked you actually needed that time device thing to do that and I'm fresh out. Man, I was about to dig into some really good Chinese too. Now it's gonna be gettin' all cold and shit. Damn, I was hungry too."

He held back another slight smile, but only just. Watching Jay watch him before his gaze got distracted by a half-dozen completely normal things. Like the turquoise sink, the clunky yellow land-line with the finger-wheel dial phone by the window. Or- the way he was standing there, still damp from the shower, with just a towel around his waist.

"Sure you aren't back to save the world, Slick? Or me? Maybe a bus-load of nuns while you're at it?" he deadpanned, teasing. Earning a snort and an eye roll as Jay tossed himself on the ottoman and let his head thud back against the wood-panel wall.

"Nah, that's next week."

He waited for a good thirty seconds before Jay cracked a lid and finally said it.

"And put some damn pants on, man. We've got ourselves a situation here, alright?! Situations mean clothes. No alien is going to take you seriously if you're are running around ass-naked."

Which actually wasn't true, but he decided not to go into detail about that particular mission.

As they said at headquarters, what happened on Sintra Prime, _stayed_ on Sintra Prime.

"This is my apartment," he pointed out, amused. "And baring any invasions or related catastrophes, I have the night off. Time travel or not, I'm afraid you just don't qualify, Hondo."

Jay's expression was surprisingly long suffering when he fixed him with pleading eyes.

"For me? Please."

He smirked the entire way into the bedroom. Making in a point not to close the door when he dropped the towel and started hunting around in his drawers. Just to make that motor-mouth start up again.

As always, Jay didn't disappoint.

"Com'on man, my eyes," the man complained, the indignance making the exhaustion lurking on the edges sound a little bit lighter. "Just because we're partners doesn't mean you can just drop your shit without giving me some warning. _Damn_."

He settled on his usual dress pants and a blue shirt. Rolling the sleeves up to his elbows as Jay made a show of pretending not to watch from the cracks of his lids. Well aware he had no intention of calling this one in, not unless Jay pressed the issue.

He had a feeling that wasn't what this was about anyway.

"How long has it been for you since-" he trailed off, sobering. Feeling the weight of those bright brown eyes and the way the boy's hand had fit small, but somehow still perfect, in his. Knowing his father would have been proud to see the man his son had become.

Jay's expression was significant, making him wonder what he knew and what he didn't. Jay had told him everything would go back the way it was, but he didn't believe that. Not with the look Jay kept fixing him with whenever he figured he wasn't looking.

"Cape Canaveral?" Jay finished for him.

He nodded.

"Two weeks," Jay answered. "You?"

His eyebrows flew up. Wondering how the hell that worked.

"Three months," he answered, smoothing his hair back from where it was feathering softly over his forehead. Free of the gel he usually used to keep it tame.  
Then-

"Been a busy few weeks?" he asked cautiously.

"You could say that," Jay answered with a sigh. "There were a couple of species that got a little handsy with Jeffrey over the time travel stuff, so we've been busy keeping him alive. Absolutely no preservation instinct in that one. I know his momma dropped him on his head when he was a baby or something."

He refrained from saying he looked like it as he led the way down the hall and into the kitchen. Hyper-aware of the soft rasp of shoe soles on carpet behind him as he crossed over to the fridge and uncapped a couple beers. Rummaging through the fridge and pulling out some leftover casserole as he flicked on the oven and shoved it inside.

"I didn't know you cooked," Jay remarked in surprise. Squeaking awkwardly on the plastic covered kitchen chairs as he tried to get comfortable.

"I don't for the most part," he admitted. "Save for breakfast and the occasional cook-out. I used to, but I got tired of getting interrupted and having everything go to waste. My housekeeper comes in a few times a week and stocks the fridge for me. Usually makes enough for three and then some."

Jay nodded.

"Its the job."

The corners of his lips tugged upwards in a commiserating smile.

"Yes, it is."

* * *

They made small talk until the food was hot enough to eat, then chowed down together. Filling the room with the sound of clinking cutlery and appreciative silence.

It was good to see him again. But it was still weird to reach for the pepper and find Jay already holding it. Looking at him in that way he'd apparently made a habit of, half laughing, half in awe. Knowing him better than he knew himself as the hours spanned out and he realized how quiet his life was without Jay in it.

"Maybe this is all a dream and I'm in the middle of choking on some chow mien," Jay remarked later as the clock showed somewhere past eleven. Looking a little too hopeful at the prospect as he yawned exaggeratedly.

"Get some sleep, Hoss," he said by way of answer. Grabbing the empty beer bottles and setting them on the counter before crossing over to the couch. Removing the cushions to reveal a fully-made hideaway bed. "You look like you need it."

Jay looked at him like he'd sprouted three heads for a long minute before his shoulders sagged. Nodding as he slumped down on the mattress and loosened his tie.

"Alright, but just because I'm 89% sure I'm on my sofa dreaming," Jay told him, cracking another huge yawn that made the protest sleepy rather than with any edge to it.

"Whatever you say, partner," he murmured with a half smile. Quietly putting their dishes in the sink and turning off the lights. Watching him drift off to sleep so fast it was a wonder he'd been able to keep his eyes open.

He tried not to let disappointment eat at him too much when nothing but the empty bed and rumpled sheets greeted him in the morning.

* * *

He was in the shower, singing along to the radio about a month later when the sound of a thud and a familiar-sounding curse echoed through the flat.

He rolled his eyes as the sound of Jay's voice filtered through the steam. Fingers working just a little bit faster to get rid of the shampoo suds.

"I ain't playin! I'm god damned sure that wall wasn't there before- ...Kay? Comon' man, I can hear the water running. _KAAAAAY!_ This ain't funny no more. I was walking through MIB and everything. I'm pretty sure O and Cee just saw me disappear into thin air."

The water hid his grin, so he let it out for free. Unable to help the chuckle that rolled out in spite himself as he tipped his head back into the spray. Breathing comfortably into the almost non-stop commentary on everything from Jay's possible broken nose to how weird it was that there was a sink and mirror in the bedroom.

"I hear you laughing. Which is still weird, by the way! _Hey!_ Get yo' ass out here!"

So he did.

* * *

The third time, Jay nearly gave him a heart attack when he came home from work and found him sitting at the kitchen table with his arms crossed. Looking for all the world like an angry house wife. Wearing- _hold on._

"Man, where have you been? I've been here for hours."

He blinked.

"Are you wearing one of my shirts?" he asked instead. Stuck on it for way too long as Jay jerked his chin and crinkled a frown at him.

"Yeah, and don't even ask, okay?" Jay answered, clearly annoyed. "I was changing for the gym and _bam-_ I was here. A little warning would have been nice is all I'm sayin'. This whole time travel thing we've got going on needs a god damned bell. You feel me?"

He nodded, deciding to just go with it.

He was good at that.

At adapting.

"Alright," he agreed, dog-tired as he dragged out the chair opposite and sat down with a grunt. "How do you propose we do that? Considering we don't know what's causing all this in the first place?"

"Rough day at the office?" Jay asked, ignoring what he'd said in favor of watching him critically.

"Negotiations with the Zrilloins," he said, by way of explanation. Frankly, not much more needed to be said.

Jay winced in sympathy.

"Ooh, how long?"

"Seventy-two hours," he said flatly. Vaguely wanting a beer, but to tired to do anything about it.

"Ouch," Jay remarked, meaning it. "The most I've ever done is fifty-six. Nearly passed out in the men's room. You- _older you-_ had to drive me home. Ate all my leftovers while he was at it."

It was strange. _Still strange._ Hearing about himself like it was another person. Aware that for all intents and purposes, it probably was. Jay's Kay was him, but he wasn't Jay's Kay yet.

_Hell, it made his head hurt._

"Go to bed, man. Before you fall over," Jay told him, smiling softly. "I'm getting tired just looking at you."

He shook his head, stickin' his metaphorical heels in.

"You're here, I don't want to waste that."

Something on the man's face told him he might have said more than he intended to. But as it was, he was too tired to dwell on it. Eye-lids feathering down-down-down in spite of his best efforts as Jay towed him towards the bedroom.

"Go to bed, Kay. I'll be here when you wake up." Jay told him firmly. Looking good and awkward and surprisingly soft in one of his button-down shirts and a pair of loud, bright orange gym shorts.

He eventually did.

But in spite of all his promises, when he jerked awake in the middle of the night because the tap in the kitchen was running, he couldn't find Jay anywhere.

* * *

_"Come on, what about you, Slick? Future you got yourself a girl?_

_"I've got you."_

He remembered that moment at the diner often. Hard to get it out of his head really.

He hadn't had time to dwell on it then, before Junior had his pie-inspired brain wave. But it'd stuck with him anyway. Digging deeper and deeper, like a Doritonia brain flea. Refusing to give him any peace.

It made him think about the rush he felt every time he opened the door and saw Jay lounging around the house or heard his voice suddenly call out from the other room.

It made him think about dangerous things.

Things like how he hadn't told anyone at headquarters what was happening.

Or how he hadn't thought of O the same way since Jay had barged his way into his life.

He'd always been good at adapting. Good at going with the flow. Rolling with the punches and throwing a few of his own along the way. But this was something else. Something he wasn't sure how to handle or if he should even be considering-

_God damnit._

That night he sat down with a bottle of Jim Bean and drank enough to thoroughly regret it the next morning. Almost grateful that Jay hadn't shown up for the fifth week in a row.

Almost.

* * *

**A/N:** Thank you for reading, please let me know what you think. - There will be one more chapter.


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer:** I don't own the "Men in Black" series or any of its characters, wishful thinking aside.

**Authors Note #1:** I couldn't let young!kay and jay go, apparently.

**Warnings:** time travel, drama, emotional hurt and comfort, flirting, just guys being dudes, romance, slow burn, clueless boys.

**Repetition (refeature)**

_**Chapter Two**_

"Why do you think you're here, sport?" he asked the next time. Choosing not to mention that Jay had Fubaran guts on his shoes and was currently tracking them around his kitchen. Watching him stretch for the half full bottle of Jim Bean in the top cabinet with a pinched expression.

"I don't know man, I told you," Jay returned, taking the glass he handed him and pouring himself a couple of over-generous fingers. "No one knows. And Griffin is, well, _Griff._ We can't actually find him. I get the feeling he's the kind to find you. Look, maybe this low on his radar or somethin'. I mean, it isn't exactly world ending, right?"

Somehow, he doubted it.

As far as he knew Griffin knew just about everything.

If he was letting this play out, there had to be a reason.

"You've told people what's happening?" he asked, seizing onto what Jay had said previously. Struck by the realization that the older Kay knew _exactly_ what had been going through his mind lately.  
_  
Christ._

"What, you haven't?" Jay shot back unhelpfully.

He didn't say anything.

"You know, I'm beginning to see why my Kay doesn't contribute to share time. You see, you actually have to _open_ your mouth to talk. Its this new thing, you'll hate it. But you know what, we'll get through it. Call it personal growth and-"

"Does_ your_ Kay know?" he interrupted. Ignoring the urge to punch the man's mouth with his lips to shut him up. Catching on to the way Junior only seemed to go motor-mouth if there was something he was avoiding.

This time it was Jay who carried the silence. Filling a glass for him while he refilled his own as the quiet stretched and the line of alcohol in the bottle steadily dropped lower and lower.

* * *

The next few months carried on like that. With Jay showing up in his apartment periodically, at all hours, usually loudly. And for the most part, they simply enjoyed each others company.

It worked well, so long as they kept to a collection of unspoken rules. Not talking about what they were actively avoiding. Meaning- the tension that'd started growing between them in the form of long glances and the ignored need for personal space. No talking about the older Kay. No talking about why he hadn't told headquarters. No talking about the little boy on the beach with the broken watch who he wouldn't meet again for many years.

He held all his feelings – all his wants and desires - close to his chest. Squashing them down day after day. Especially when Jay inevitably found entirely new ways to make him want to smile or maybe just sidle up beside him and kiss him quiet. Telling himself he was lucky to get what he had of him. And that it wasn't fair or right - on so many levels - to want more.

But he did.

It worked well until the morning he walked out of his bedroom and saw _himself _sitting on his own god damn sofa.

* * *

There was no question of who it was.

They were older, a lot older, but there was still something recognizable in the lines around his eyes and the way he held himself. Looking so similar to his old man he nearly did a double take. Pausing in the act of doing up the buttons on his shirt cuffs as the man gave him a deliberate once over. Mouth twitching at the corners before chewing out a tired sigh.

"Never took us for a coward," the older Kay commented blandly, apparently in the mood to cut right to the quick. It was a personality trait he appreciated, even if it was coming from himself.

"Then why haven't you done anything about it?" he challenged, sitting down in the chair opposite. Aware he was going to be late, and not caring one bit. It wasn't like anyone would give him grief for it. Not after what happened in Cape Canaveral.

He wasn't a junior Agent anymore.

Dee said it was about time.

The expression on the older version of his face said it all. _You know why._

"You love him," the older Kay said eventually, after the stalemate. Far less of an accusation than it could have been, but still enough to sting.

"So do you," he returned, shooting for professional but failing when his tone edged into the unfamiliar slur of frustrated anger. "And you have for longer than me."

A muscle in the man's cheek twitched, pulling at the deep lines around his mouth.

_Oh, yeah._ He did.

He knew that look.

Especially on his own face.

"So, why?" he pressed, thoughts so jumbled it made his head hurt. Feeling betrayed or at the very least disappointed in himself that he'd had Jay this long and never even tried. "Why haven't you- _we-_ why haven't _we_ given it a shot? Is it about regulations, or-"

"I don't give a rat's ass about regulations. And neither do you," the older Kay bit off bluntly. "Not those ones anyway. The truth is, this has never been about you or me. It's about Junior. This is a choice _he_ needs to make."

He frowned, arms crossing over his chest.

"How do you know?"

"Griffin," the man remarked simply, pausing like that said it all. Which, of course, it did. "I was going to tell him. Especially when he started disappearing and showing up here. I figured I didn't have anything to lose. …I remembered how it felt- how _we_ felt whenever we came home and found him waiting. But one night, Griffin showed up and told me how it had to be."

He rubbed his temples. Confused.

"Then why are you here? Considering you already knew I wouldn't do anything about all this?" he demanded, before realizing something rather important he'd missed until now. "And while we're on the subject, _how_ are you here?"

His older self shifted on the edge of the sofa cushions. Firmly on the side he preferred, and apparently always did. It made him want to throw the entire damn thing out and buy something complete different. Just to spite him. The future.

"I'm here because I know myself," the older Kay said bluntly. "I made a mistake, keeping him at arms length. I thought I was doing the right thing, but- it was just another excuse. I couldn't lose him. _We can't._ Not to this job or to anyone else. I can admit that now because I've lived it, you haven't. I know you've felt it. At the Agency. In the car. At Cape Canaveral. _Here_. He fits."

He leaned back against the counter, bracing himself as the words washed over him. Hard truths to swallow, but not exactly surprising ones either. He'd never wanted to live life regretting things he hadn't taken the chance to change.

"You feel it, I know because I did. _I do. _Here and in the future. And the crazy thing is? He feels it too."

The screeching halt his mind acted out would have been comical if someone had bothered to animate it. Leaving him speechless in a very unflattering way as he watched his older self unfold himself from the couch and step forward.

"I'm here because if you pull this off, neither one of us has to be a god damned _idiot_," the older Kay practically growled. Making his head snap up and look at himself – really look. Realizing that what he was feeling was _nothing_ compared to what his older self was stuck with. "Just because we have to wait him out, doesn't mean we can't give him something to work with. …Something to get him on the right track. I didn't. And I think it might have made all the difference if I had. He respects us too much not to need some sort of sign. And I think you and I both know, we passed friends a long time ago."

_"Come on, what about you, Slick? Future you got yourself a girl?_

_"I've got you."_

His mouth was dry when he finally opened it again. Decision already made.

Hell, he'd made it months ago.

"Just been a couple of months for me," he answered softly.

The older Kay actually smiled.

It was a good look for him.

He opened his mouth to say something. Probably something self-defeating or at least deprecating. Maybe even to ask if this was the kind of history they shouldn't be changing. Or if he had the moral right to even try. But the expression on the older Kay's face was enough to shut him up before he had a chance to start.

He sighed, instead deciding on brutal honesty.

"I can't say I'm fond of this whole time travel thing," he admitted with an amused drawl. Sinking into the leather chair by the TV he rarely sat on, but Jay seemed to love. No longer collecting a fine layer of dust his housekeeper valiantly cleaned off when she tidied up at the end of each week. Exhaustedly pleased at the state his life was in, considering.

"You have no idea, hoss."

It was just threatening enough that the cowboy in him decided to take it as a challenge.

* * *

He spent the next few days deep in thought. Knowing he was confusing the hell out of Dee when he chose to hole up in one of the offices he never used and stare at the computer terminal like he had magnets in his skull. Knowing it wasn't just nerves making butterflies flutter in his belly as he read up on more than a few pertinent subjects. When Dee had asked later how his 'research' was going he nearly made a scene out of choking on his lunch. Getting a side-eye from his partner until he finally forced himself to nod and say 'not bad.'

He could admit he was a bit out of his depth here.

He knew how _he_ felt.

But he didn't much know about the rest.

He was more open-minded than most, but this was a lot to handle.

Before Jay had come along, he'd been sweet on O and her soft curves and dimpled smile.

And now?

Well, it was a leap, to be sure.

Still, cold-feet or not, he couldn't wait to _jump_.

And more than anything, he figured that said something.

After all, who was he to argue with himself?

* * *

Ultimately, he took everything to heart and pulled out all the stops trying to help things along. He made an effort to cook some meals from scratch whenever Jay popped in and they weren't dog-tired from saving the world. He asked his housekeeper to stock certain things he knew Jay liked and even managed to sneak in a bit of skin on skin while he was at it. Letting his body language do the talking. Resting the occasional hand on the man's shoulders when they _purposefully_ collided in the kitchen or on the way to the bathroom. And all the while, that warm feeling in the pit of his stomach just got warmer.

He felt like it might be working too. Because he'd gotten the impression that Jay was watching him closely now. Like he was trying to figure him or out worse. Maybe he was laughing at him. _No. Not that_. But there was something. Something good and warm that felt like a grade A belly laugh but hotter – _better._

He wasn't that good at talking, never had been. Not as bad as he figured the older Kay was, but he still tried that too. Never getting tired of the light that would perk up in the back of Jay's eyes when he gave away another little piece of himself. It made the strange vulnerability he was fighting with every time seem worth it, anyway.

One night he brought a couple slices of pie home from the diner. Barely having time to shrug out of his suit jacket and get them on plates - his with cheddar and Jay's with a scoop of ice cream - when the man himself appeared in his living room with a familiar static sound, then an audible sigh of relief.

Almost like he was happy to be there.

He smiled to himself.

It was a good thought.

"I got pie," he remarked, by way of greeting as the sound of Jay's shoes hushed across the carpet. "Come grab a slice, Slick."

"You don't have to tell me twice," Jay hummed, looking pleased. Knocking shoulders with him briefly as they crossed the kitchen and settled into chairs on either side of the table. "Cause, man, it's been a _day_. You know what I'm sayin?"

They were halfway through their slices when Jay's fork slowed on route to his mouth. Looking like a damn fool as he fixed him with a clear fish-eye. Suspicious as a tom-cat near a wire trap and potentially twice as dangerous.

"This problem-solving pie, Kay?"

His bite of pie went down hard as he swallowed deliberately.

"You trying to tell me something?" Jay tried again, even as something significant, terrifying and exciting seemed to slot into place in his dark eyes.

"You tell me, Hondo," he answered carefully. Raising his eyes level for the first time and keeping them there for a long breathless moment. Only broken when Jay's fork slipped dumb and loud out of his fingers. Staring at him with a shocked, flayed-open expression he couldn't remember ever seeing on the man's face.

"Trust the pie," he murmured, more to himself than anything when he looked up again and realized Jay had disappeared mid-slice.

* * *

"Your hideaway sucks, by the way," Jay said one evening. Apparently by way of explanation as the man slipped in beside him without even so much as an invitation. Immediately hogging the sheets and prying a pillow out of his pile as he looked up at the ceiling with a smile. Not bothering to wonder how many regulations they were breaking with this moment alone. He didn't care.

Instead he just sighed, pleased and relieved and-

"Took you long enough," he murmured affectionately before rolling over and kissing him quiet – like he'd always wanted too. Swallowing the words until Jay was kissing him back just as hungrily. Tussling for control until Jay gave- or maybe he did and between one breath and the next there was the firm, slick pressure of another man's fist around his cock and suddenly he was _exactly_ where he wanted to be.

* * *

Jay was still panting as he smirked into the dark. Exhaling into the ceiling as the pleasure faded into a hopeful sort of comfort. Hopelessly tangled around one another and doing some serious stretching to both avoid the wet spots.

"I wonder if my Kay can still bend like that," Jay muttered, still sounding somewhat shell-shocked, when he got his breath back.

He didn't know if it was the endorphins or just the fact that Jay was here- threatening to overheat the bed and spread tacky sweat across the clean sheets, but either way he couldn't help it. Laughing up at the sparkling, pop-corn ceiling as Jay grumbled and shoved his hip. Sending an open invitation to equal force and gravity as it made him thump back into the man's chest with an affirming sound.

"Only one way to find out, Slick. In fact, I'm pretty sure he's counting on it."

* * *

When he woke up the next morning, Jay was still there.

As far as baby steps went, that was good enough for him.

Either way, he wasn't in any rush.

After all, by his estimation, they had just about as near forever as two people could get.

* * *

**A/N:** Thank you for reading, please let me know what you think. This story is now complete.


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